Sharing stories of fear, frustration, hope and acceptance

Archive for March, 2012

Happy BIRTHDAY Frankie!


Happy 7th Birthday to Frankie!

Dear Frankie, your birthday is coming and I just wanted Nana to help you see
this special message just for you.
You are a good boy, you do great in school, you are a nice and caring friend and I am glad we are having your birthday party on Wednesday because I couldn’t wait for you to get cake and presents. So, continue to be a good boy.
Love Mom


The Road Not Taken

The Road Not Taken
by Robert Frost-

Two roads diverged in a yellow wood,
And sorry I could not travel both
And be one traveler, long I stood
And looked down one as far as I could
To where it bent in the undergrowth;

Then took the other, as just as fair,
And having perhaps the better claim
Because it was grassy and wanted wear;
Though as for that the passing there
Had worn them really about the same,

And both that morning equally lay
In leaves no step had trodden black.
Oh, I kept the first for another day!
Yet knowing how way leads on to way,
I doubted if I should ever come back.

I shall be telling this with a sigh
Somewhere ages and ages hence:
Two roads diverged in a wood, and I—
I took the one less traveled by,
And that has made all the difference.

There’s a lot going on with Adam at this time. We are all overwhelmed by what a journey this has become.
He’s due for Brain Surgery in three days, (doctors just told us yesterday they had changed their minds.) Adam has Cortical Dysplasia (a malformation of his brain). This area seems to be the reason for all the seizure activity. At first they hoped that meds would help but he’s on so many that he is too sedated to breath without oxygen.
Obviously he can not go on this way so our only option is to give him this opportunity to get the 2cm area on the right front of his brain removed. It raises alot of questions that I would love to answer- not only for myself but for other families facing this monster head on, the truth is I don’t know all the answers. I don’t even know what else to ask at this point. It doesn’t seem we can afford to continue on this road. All I do know is that something has to change, we need to try this surgery and GOD WILLING THIS IS THE MIRACLE THAT ADAM DESERVES. It is however the road less traveled and like Robert Frost the poet stated, it should make all the difference.

As if the situation weren’t bad enough, they scheduled the surgery for Adam on Frankie’s birthday… The one day we wanted to give all our attention to Frankie- so we are just going to move Frankie’s party up to Wednesday.

The Power of Your Vision

Two and a half months in the PICU. Adam had a fever today, the doctor said his lung is full of secretions….Could it be pneumonia???
Still he has seizures and still I try to see the bright side of life.

Have you heard of Joel Osteen??
Thanks to a facebook post I came across one of Joel Osteen sermons called, “The Power of Your Vision”.
He claims that God gives each of us a picture to look at. A picture to remind us of his plan. In one of these pictures I see Adam able. Adam walking and Signing, successful and happy.

God knows there are times when the promise seems it may not come to pass but when that happens we are to look at the picture and make faith rise in our hearts. Your vision is meant to keep you encouraged. We are reminded by Joel Osteen to look not through the eyes of the natural, but look through the eyes of Faith.

I forgot ALL of this! In my worry and fear I forgot it all.
It felt like each time I saw the light at the end of this tunnel it would flicker and fade out. The picture in my heart was fading fast almost gone- BUT NOT ANYMORE. I promise I will not allow my vision of Adam or Frankie’s future to be a negative one just because my faith has been shaken.

So as my husband would say: LOOK ON THE BRIGHT SIDE OF LIFE.
(easier said than done- I KNOW)